So the day for me to pass/mailed my invitation is finally here. I din know it can be so tiring just

Stamping the envelopes

Writing the guest name

Folding the card

Slot in the card into the envelope

Glue and paste the stamp for those invitation that is for mailing.


Tsssk. But is was cute to see momma having her own set of guestlist. Every morning after subuh I will see her seating at her small table in the living room… vetting the guestlist. It is just refreshing to see that side of momma. She always have her walls up and practically in her own world. Which she still is from time to time. But it just warmed my heart that she is equally excited for me.

Also I din know that It can be tiring to meet friend after work. I was literally dying but it was worthwhile. I tried my best but honestly I can’t go on anymore. So SORRYYYYYY!! all the other invitation all needs to be mailed.

So met the poly pockets my DHHM kia, for dinner.

It was a fun catch-up and they celebrated my belated birthday that caught me by suprise.


Thank you babies for the thoughtful cute gift. Time really flies when you have good company. Thankful for all the good wishes. I am so happy that they are also excited to get me married to aby. Can’t wait to see you babies on my wedding day.😘


Next I met my another set of poly pocket. My chinese girlfriends who I adore to death. Look how much we have grown!

2014 vs 2017

Even though it was a short meet up but it means so much to me. I hope you loved you lil gift from me & also thank you for being happy for me & aby.

Thank you for the belated birthday gift my dearest sayang.! I lovelove it! It makes me so happy even by just looking at it.


Till i see you babydolls again at my wedding. πŸ¦„πŸ’•


Sometimes I am overwhelmed with happiness cos I am surrounded with so many beautiful souls who loves me as I am. It was never easy growing up and getting judged cos of my face. Well naturally I have the resting b*t*h face [RBF]. Till this dat i am being judged cos of my RBF. πŸ˜”

But all these people makes everything a whole lot better. They are those who truly know me. Who knows me inside out.

Honestly I can be the craziest and the most clingy pampered girl ever. Sometimes my friend literally gave up on me. At times it do affect me a lil tad too much, but most of the time I just don’t care. I am happy with my own little bubble. I have a family who loves me. Aby who adores me. Alot of girfriends and friends who accepted me. Them; who still find and remember me from time to time. For that I am thankful.


xx Ryn


Bangkok w Lil P

A week after my birthday, I went to bangkok w my lil P. πŸ™„
Meet my annoying youngest sister.

It was kind of impromptu you see.

  1. I don’t enjoyed trips that consist shopping. Went bangkok before and I hate the rush shopping. End up I was completely exhausted everyday and even after the trip.
  2.  I need to save my AL and not to spend unnecessarily.

But I gave up when lil P was persistent wanting me to go and I am glad I went ahead with this trip. I can to spend time with her and also i was once at her age always eager to travel. So lucky her to have an ahem amazing kakak.πŸ€—

Long story cut short. Since I am on a tight budget and we only have each other for this trip. Yes its only the 2 of us going bangkok. Aby was not pleased btw. HAHA. I wanted to have a nice hotel that is convenient and cheap. Of course safe for us 2 girls not on some sleazy alley or whatnot. & I stumble upon this hostel.

OMG! That was the best highlight of the trip. A first time for me staying in a dormitory..a mixed dormitory to be exact. Again aby was not that pleased.

But it was awesome you see & that is all that matter. Haha! A video of my awesome bunk!




Their rooftop deck is such a cool place to just hangout.


For this bangkok trip I let lil P decide what she want to do. I will just follow. So we walked like crazy and she shopped like a maniac. Layankan je la ye. Sayang adik nye pasal…Kalau tak layan nanti muke merajok. Malas betul.

To my lil P

I hope you enjoyed the trip. I had fun bonding closer with you for this trip even when you can be such a a**. Like you say this is the last trip I will travel with you before being someone’s wife. You know how much aby and kakak adores you right. Fret not, even when we no longer stay under the same roof..I will always be there for you anytime you need me. When I have my own place you and adik will always welcome to stay. & of course I looked forward making you both my maid to clean the house and care for my kid. Look after mom & adik for me when I away. I know you will be emotional reading this..cos you’re such a crybaby! Boo! So I will make it short la. Study hard and do well in life. I will always support you in whatever you wanna pursue in. Just spread your wings and soar high. I love you P. Ever since you were the small annoying baby who rubbed your disgusting pacifier in my face. 



Till the next trip……

xx Ryn


Belated Birthday

It’s been more than a month since my birthday. Yes IKR!! I’ve been rather occupied with all the unexpected workload. Not only that, I have been constantly paranoid if I have missed out anything in regard to the wedding preps. Haish! Anywooooooo this year birthday celebration was perfect. Just the way how I wanted it. Told aby that all I need is a full day spend with him and a quiet dinner. Oh and I really wanted to watch Beauty and the beast. Hehe

Since it was kinda chillax birthday celebration, I din take alot of picture. But this few picture will do la eh.

Had a wonderful dinner at roy et vous. The sweet potato is to die for and their other dishes mmmdaap laaa. No flaws to point out. Been there a few times and they never fail me.


After that we proceed with the movie, din know that the cathay platinum suits is having a complimentary food/bites inclusive in the tickets. Kind of wasted as we were full at that point of time. Movie was erm ok. Love belle more than cinderella but I can watch cinderella over and over again as compared to beauty and the beast. That is my take on the movie.

After that I just had a quiet time with aby and we talk about everything under the sun. errm stars la eh since by then at night already.

Thank you aby for sparing me a bit of your time just to make me happy and making sure I enjoyed my day. I love every second of it. To 2 more 13th to go.

This year all I wished for is that all my loved ones especially both my parent to be in the pinkiest of health and be happy. May allah swt grant them all the good things in life and the highest rank in paradise. Also may I be a wise lady who only hear the good in others, speak only the good about other and have a good intention in doing anything. May I stay composed and stay silent when I am angry. To never get affected with what others have to say about me, especially those who don’t even know me. To never go to their level and talked ill about them.. or worst having the thoughts of hurting them way more than how hurt I felt. All this are some of the few things that I hope allah swt will guide me through to changed and be a better human being whole with the purest heart.

xx Ryn



I felt like I needed to vent all my frustration this minute. Honestly the past few months.. have been crazy at work. Let’s not talk about the workload la.. Its already crazy as its a acute med ward plus all this executive & in charge din even give a thought for their ground staff isit?

Right now I feel like being competent in your job is actually a disadvantage for you. They will squeeze you dry. As they always assume that you can handle anything. Yes, I can.. but how long more. You know being mistreated is one thing. You don’t even motivates your staff & I did my very best to hold my team together till we became one of the strongest team… & now you just come along & messed my team apart. 

Eh betul punya takde cara eh. What makes me so angry is that nobody got the cheek to even consult me & even tell me. You tell my girls not to tell me as you will personally inform me. You have every opportunity to tell me but you didn’t. Yang paling sedih eh.. kite ni orang islam tapi kenapa ehh kejam sangat? Memang betul la rambut je sama hitam.. hati tu.. bnyk setan uh agaknye. Ahhh.

I don’t even know what kind of organisation I am working for. All the people with higher ranks are more focus on being promoted. Ignoring all their ground staff welfare. Those who are not working on the ground are the ones deciding what’s best for us. Ape logic eh? Try la run the ward, sebulan je la kasi confirm balek rumah nangis. 

You know what is more sad is that all these higher authorities said that should we have any problem or need help,do look & call them. When we tell them the difficulties.. setakat amek tahu je lepas tu cakap give us time. Sampai sekarang masey sama jeee. Eh puas ati tak payah bilang! Nak cakap bodoh blajar sampai ade degree. Tapi bodoh jugak la.

That’s not all. You gave me all those extra jobs as you ‘claimed’ you have plans for me. You have a vision to groomed me. At this rate, even if my career will be stagnant..tak pasal la bro. Sekarang je keje da macam anjing.. wait anjing pun tak keje macam kita. Because 

  1. I have a superior who “claimed that they care about the staff” but did nothing to actually solve the issue. & always said they did.takut uh nanti I will be good for nothing also.
  2. Now you don’t even respect me as a leader for my team. By just snatching my gurls without asking my opinion, which you claim was the department decision. Besarnya takde cara. Sampai budak tu nanges2 pun korang hati kering eh.
  3. Sekarang je takd post pape je keje taik da macam2 kiteorg kene clear.. naik pangkat taktau la ape sampah korang nak kasi kita. So kirim salam je.

When all this happen.. I realise maybe my relationship with allah swt is not being cared for. & I know whatever happen is actually the best for me. Even though it breaks me apart..i found peace in all the chaos.

Nak marah2 maki hamun ni smue kerja syaitan. Then tergerak hati nak tengok vidoe story of the prophet by mufti menk. Cos I remember that I am alway at peace whenever I hear stories of the prophet. & true enough I stumbled upon sooo many soothing words of encouragement. & I know this is all allah swt doing..Thank you ya allah! For everything. Even there are times I neglected you. But i know you never once forgotten about me. 

Some of the words that I hope will help anybody out there like how it helped me to feel so much better..

In a midst of hardship & if you are the only one who stands out cos you’re fighting for justice… you will face alot of difficulties.But if you are making a difference..a good difference.Stand by it.. even if the whole world is against you. Even if nothing gonna change.Bcos allah will praised you together with all the angels. & that is all that matters.  Kindness begets kindness.

On a happier note.. passed my 1st lesson! Like finalllllyyyyy!!! So glad that I enrolled myself… vent a part of my frustration while having practical just now & it was the bestest feeling ever.😍


Fitting Day 1

This post is long overdue and only now I dragged my lazy ass to penned all of it down. This is one of the best part of the whole process planning a wedding. I was super excited and nervous all at the same time. hehe. It final dawned on me that I am really gonna get married.

So we took leave as Fa told us it would take the whole day, which turn out to be true. Reached 2 minutes earlier as I have stumbled across status from MUA and read blog post from BTB not to be late. Some vendors can be so bitchy. So A+ for making an effort not to be late. hehe


At this point….. Mega excited.!

Image may contain: phone

Before the appointment, all I know that 1 of the 3 outfit need to be yellow. The other 2 outfit I am fine with anything that is nice. Which turn out to be a headache as there are plenty of pretty dresses to choose from. Furthermore, I din want to set so many expectation  as it restricting myself with a certain dresses. End up amek kau, berpasang-pasang gown kene try. Thank you so much to Fa for helping squeezing in my fatty self into the dresses. Ingat kan tak bole muat, hah kau Fa betulnye tolong sumbat kan babat yg degil2 tu smue. hehe.

The whole process was surprisingly exhausting. By the end of everything I was so tired. Aby was worried as I was quiet the whole time. But I not gonna deny I enjoyed every single minute of it. Thank you FA for being ever so patient with me. Dah la tak tau baju ape nak pilih lepas tu cerewet plak tu. But Fa gave her best to give all her opinions and what looks nice on me, sebab aby ni smue rembat cakap cantik. Tak tau betul ke tak.

Another worrying part was that I have been gaining back some of the weight that I have lost. Which is sooooooo annoying. Oh well ryn, you got no one to blame except yaself. Have been slacking and whacking all the unhealthy food. WHICH I SHOULD NOT BE DOING LA!!

I will show some of the many beautiful gowns that I tried on. hehe



Kindly don’t mind my fatty self and ugly face. Hee. I will work hard on losing weight so can look vava voom on my wedding day. Biar meletup ryn! hahaa. In shaa allah! Doakan ryn la ye. AMIN!!

After my fitting session at TWB, we went to fitting for aby’s suit. Fuhhhhh komain ni aby! Sampai nyonya kedai tu snap alot of picture sebab aby pun bole tahan meletup jugak pakai suit. Mengancam la aby ni.! Siap nyonya tu suruh posing macam-macam style. & since they have renting services for shoes, ape lagy ryn pun sewa heels. Da selamat tak payah pening kepala carik heels. So I guess that is it for this post.

I realized that sebanyak-banyak vendors for wedding ryn, I have been ranting about TWB je kan. Ape nak buat kan bridal ni la paling ryn risau if tak dapat. Sampai sanggup tukar date kalau tak dapat TWB. Vendors lain in shaa allah lepas da habis majlis or if ade cerita panas nak share baru ryn will penned it down.HAHAHA for memory sake la step cerita panas je. Sebab if sekarang nak cerita panjang.. memang takde benda nak cerita. Ryn amik that vendor sebab I just like it. Tu je. HAHA.

Ok la. I guess till next time.

xx Ryn



Wahhh its been a long long time. Da berabuk ni site kalau bole nampak habuk. HAHA. oh well ni semua normal. Kalau tak pemalas bukan ryn namenye. So let’s see….what I wanna bebel about. Banyak bende uh actually. But we shall see.
For wedding preparations.

Fuh! First things first I am so happy most of the things are done. Eh wait..in fact everything has already been booked. 

Berkat βœ… 

Card βœ… Just to collect the card. Kemaruk eh 4 months more, but the card are all ready to be issued. 

Caterers βœ… In another word, we & my mother went to finalise what we want & don’t want. As you all know I am all about being simple. My definition of simple is

  1. 🚫dulang. except for the rings,mas kawin & hantaran.
  2. 🚫sireh dara. Tak kesah la ape orang nak kata. 
  3. 🚫bunga pahar. All this bunga pahar & sireh dara mahal gila eh. Tak paham asal mahal nah. 
  4. 🚫wedding cake. Tak suka jadi centre of attention.
  5. 🚫live station, nak makan buffet aje. Ice cream, churros or ape2 la tu smue takde. Barang leceh.
  6. 🚫candy corner & photobooth.

Initially we planned not to even have a wedding cake, barang leceh uh guys & so freaking expensive sia. Furthermore I don’t eat cake sey. But looking at my mum face, I settled for pulut, so mother please makan pulut tu dgn senyuman meleret ok. Cik nani managed to find a good deal that is why we took it. We had alot of add ons. Like literally. So much of making it simple. Bole gila. Added a total of additional 4k. 😭 Takpela untuk ibunda ku.
Bridal robe βœ… Been looking for a robe & managed to find a good one. In fact planning to buy them for my favourite girls. 

ROMM⚠️ Applied online βœ… Just need to go for the interview.

Kursus booking βœ… But the dates are a few weeks before the wedding. Go je don’t scared.

So what else eh. Hmm. Since I am not having bridesmaids. Yes I finally decided on it.

 1. I don’t wanna hurt anybody feelings .

 2. Having sooo many bridesmaids tak perlu ok. Since I have so many girls in my life..If you pick one you must pick all. So lupe kan saje.

I guess I’ll asked all my girls to come w a colour code. But my high school girls will be buying their own kain. Can’t stop them cos Im the last girl to get married. As the saying saving the best for last..you either go big or go home. HAHA. Prolly will get the same kain for my family too. Cos em girls are like sisters to me.

Ape lagy eh.. mega excited for my bridal fitting. 3 more weeks to go. In fact february will be packed with alot of things. 

So I guess that is it for now. I will try to update regularly..with pictures too. In shaa allah. I hope all of you who is reading this is in good health & are happy. If you’re having a bad day..*virtual hugs* for you. Good days will come.. have faith okie. πŸ’‹ 

xx Ryn


Not gonna lie the ‘dugaan’ nak kawin is spot on damn true sia. Waaahhh! Am not even kidding. Really trying so hard to hang on. I just don’t understand how your own flesh & blood can be soooo urghhh.. Maybe someday if I have the feel then I would penned it all down.😭

xx Ryn